"I have gifted you with amazing freedom."
As I read those words in my devotional Jesus Calling I couldn't help but think of the women in Africa. Freedom means something completely different for them. Right now as I'm on the cusp of making decisions that will affect the next year of my life, I have the freedom to choose. I have the freedom to choose where I live, what my profession is, who I marry, what I spend my money on, etc. Many women here don't have the luxury of many of the freedoms I do. They don't have the freedom to choose who they marry; currently there is a 16 year old patient on the ward who was married at 10! She got pregnant by age 12 and was in obstructed labor, her baby died, and she was left with a fistula. She did not have the freedom to say "No" to marriage at 10. She doesn't have the freedom to go to school and get an education. She doesn't get to choose what her profession is, or where she spends her money.
So all that to open your eyes to what you think freedom is. It opened mine.
Wednesday, January 30, 2013
Saturday, January 5, 2013
The new ten
Ten upcountry ladies arrived tonight. I was sitting with a group of nurses recounting a conversation one of them had with a patient. The patient, not dry after multiple attempts to repair the hole in her bladder, was telling the nurse that although she isn't healed physically, she is beginning to heal emotionally. That is a major feat when you consider what these ladies have been through. They are absolute survivors in so many ways. What continually amazes me is the amount of love they offer us so freely. When asked 'why,' she said "We don't have money, or anything to repay you, so we are paying you with love." She just wishes her family, many of whom abandoned her after developing the fistula, could see how much "the white people" love her and care for her.
It has been my prayer from the beginning that despite whether they are wet or dry, they would sense and know the love God has for them. It's not about the surgeries, or whether they are wet or dry---I just want them to realize how much they are loved by the King. "If the next surgeries succeeds or fails, what is more important is that I can go back to my village with confidence knowing that I am loved," said Nana when asked how she would feel if she is never healed.
Today as I thought about starting up another round of VVF, to be honest, I was burdened. It seemed like running uphill again when I just reached the bottom. I've known the 20 ladies that are on the ward right now for over a month now. I've grown to love them like they are my proverbial children and I can't imagine loving any more ladies like I love them. That is, until ten beautiful ladies showed up on my doorstep this evening.
As I answered a page that would notify me that there were VVF patients on the dock, my excitement grew tremendously. One of the nurses and I excitedly ran to the gangway and as we looked out we could see the ladies congregating around the taxi.
I could smell them as I approached---no doubt they were my ladies. There was a mix of emotions in the air. As we walked up to them, we were bombarded with hugs, kisses, and greetings in local tongues. The sense of desperation was tangible as I checked everyone's name to account for them all. Some began to cry---afraid they would be turned away because they didn't bring ID and their name wasn't on the list. The tears dried up and smiles returned when I sent the taxi driver away and one by one led the ladies toward the gangway.
As they stood near the foot of the gangway many of them pointed in the direction of the gangway platform---through charades I informed that indeed they were going to walk up that giant ladder-like apparatus, up a couple stories, to their new home. Some forged ahead fearless, but the older ladies were reluctant and scared. One of the translators, a young man, lovingly noticed they were scared and took them by the arm to lead them up the gangway.
Chitra, one of the Gurkha's--a soldier in the Nepalese army--pantomimed that they must use the hand sanitizer before entering the ship and one-by-one as the ladies passed by the hand sanitizer machine, hands were cleansed.
We mounted the stairs that would take us into the belly of the ship and their home for the next few days and hopefully weeks as they have surgery and are healed. I wonder what they're thinking as they mount the stairs; some pause at the top unsure, and others gallantly forge ahead. We reach the corridor that will take them to C ward--a transitional ward, it most recently housed the screening team and hopefully soon will open as a full fledged ward bustling with new life, but for now it's the women's hope center. The ladies will stay here until the next surgeon arrives and examinations begin on Monday.
As they take the long walk down the corridor to C ward in the quiet of the night I can feel their sense of relief. I open the door of C ward and find 10 beds all made up and ready for them; Each stocked with a gown, a bag of goodies and a blanket for warmth. There's a warm glow emanating from the ward; the once harsh florescent light has been covered by African fabric giving off a warm cast.
What happens next is one of the many reasons I love these ladies so much. One-by-one the VVF ladies on B ward--also awaiting the arrival of the new surgeon--wakes up, gets out of bed and excitedly comes to greet the new ten. The calm of C ward has been replaced by excitement as greetings and hugs are exchanged, food and water passed out and showers commenced.
As I leave them to settling in, my heart is so full of thankfulness as God replaces my original fear with utter joy and love for these new ladies.
It has been my prayer from the beginning that despite whether they are wet or dry, they would sense and know the love God has for them. It's not about the surgeries, or whether they are wet or dry---I just want them to realize how much they are loved by the King. "If the next surgeries succeeds or fails, what is more important is that I can go back to my village with confidence knowing that I am loved," said Nana when asked how she would feel if she is never healed.
Today as I thought about starting up another round of VVF, to be honest, I was burdened. It seemed like running uphill again when I just reached the bottom. I've known the 20 ladies that are on the ward right now for over a month now. I've grown to love them like they are my proverbial children and I can't imagine loving any more ladies like I love them. That is, until ten beautiful ladies showed up on my doorstep this evening.
As I answered a page that would notify me that there were VVF patients on the dock, my excitement grew tremendously. One of the nurses and I excitedly ran to the gangway and as we looked out we could see the ladies congregating around the taxi.
I could smell them as I approached---no doubt they were my ladies. There was a mix of emotions in the air. As we walked up to them, we were bombarded with hugs, kisses, and greetings in local tongues. The sense of desperation was tangible as I checked everyone's name to account for them all. Some began to cry---afraid they would be turned away because they didn't bring ID and their name wasn't on the list. The tears dried up and smiles returned when I sent the taxi driver away and one by one led the ladies toward the gangway.
As they stood near the foot of the gangway many of them pointed in the direction of the gangway platform---through charades I informed that indeed they were going to walk up that giant ladder-like apparatus, up a couple stories, to their new home. Some forged ahead fearless, but the older ladies were reluctant and scared. One of the translators, a young man, lovingly noticed they were scared and took them by the arm to lead them up the gangway.
Chitra, one of the Gurkha's--a soldier in the Nepalese army--pantomimed that they must use the hand sanitizer before entering the ship and one-by-one as the ladies passed by the hand sanitizer machine, hands were cleansed.
We mounted the stairs that would take us into the belly of the ship and their home for the next few days and hopefully weeks as they have surgery and are healed. I wonder what they're thinking as they mount the stairs; some pause at the top unsure, and others gallantly forge ahead. We reach the corridor that will take them to C ward--a transitional ward, it most recently housed the screening team and hopefully soon will open as a full fledged ward bustling with new life, but for now it's the women's hope center. The ladies will stay here until the next surgeon arrives and examinations begin on Monday.
As they take the long walk down the corridor to C ward in the quiet of the night I can feel their sense of relief. I open the door of C ward and find 10 beds all made up and ready for them; Each stocked with a gown, a bag of goodies and a blanket for warmth. There's a warm glow emanating from the ward; the once harsh florescent light has been covered by African fabric giving off a warm cast.
What happens next is one of the many reasons I love these ladies so much. One-by-one the VVF ladies on B ward--also awaiting the arrival of the new surgeon--wakes up, gets out of bed and excitedly comes to greet the new ten. The calm of C ward has been replaced by excitement as greetings and hugs are exchanged, food and water passed out and showers commenced.
As I leave them to settling in, my heart is so full of thankfulness as God replaces my original fear with utter joy and love for these new ladies.
Monday, December 17, 2012
Hope Reborn...and a dress ceremony to celebrate!
Today was an unusual day. There was an excitement and joy buzzing around the air from the moment the ladies woke up. I don't know if they sensed that something exciting was happening today, or if it was just by chance, but they were unusually cheery. I love to see how God brings light to the darkness. It's amazing the transformation that has happened since last week. I had to look at a calendar to make sure that only a week and a few days had passed since Dr. Lauri left because it has felt like an eternity has passed! The dark mood that was inhabiting the ward has lifted, and left in it's place is laughter, fun, and dancing! It's almost as if we have an entirely different ward of ladies.
After 4.5 llloonnnggg weeks of emotional ups and downs, joys and sorrows, tears and laughter, wet and dry, we FINALLY had a dress ceremony! The dress ceremony is the symbol of Hope Reborn. It's a celebration not only of their physical healing, but also their emotional healing. A new dress is a symbol of a new life, a new hope, a new beginning.
So today we witnessed great delight and rejoicing with testimonies of healing; songs of hope and thankfulness; and tears of gladness. The pounding of the drums, the sweet melody of their voices, and the tears of joy falling from their faces still reverberate in my mind....it's a joyful noise to the Lord all the earth.
After 4.5 llloonnnggg weeks of emotional ups and downs, joys and sorrows, tears and laughter, wet and dry, we FINALLY had a dress ceremony! The dress ceremony is the symbol of Hope Reborn. It's a celebration not only of their physical healing, but also their emotional healing. A new dress is a symbol of a new life, a new hope, a new beginning.
"I delight greatly in the Lord;
my soul rejoices in my God.
For He has clothed me with garments
of salvation
and arrayed me in a robe of righteousness." Isaiah 61:10
So today we witnessed great delight and rejoicing with testimonies of healing; songs of hope and thankfulness; and tears of gladness. The pounding of the drums, the sweet melody of their voices, and the tears of joy falling from their faces still reverberate in my mind....it's a joyful noise to the Lord all the earth.
Sunday, December 16, 2012
You've done a good work
The past few weeks of VVF have been intense, to say the least. It has been one complication after another, with many of the women with failed surgeries. The mood on the ward has been somber, and without hope. That is until the first two ladies had their catheters removed, and remained dry! That marked a turn around on the ward, for the patients and nurses alike. The women started cheering and smiling for the first time in a while.
On a random Tuesday one of the women decided to go for a walk down the hall. I stopped her at the door and told her she had to take some more women with her if she wanted to go for a walk. You see, the women have gotten lazy- demanding the nurses to get their water for them, while it is just an arms reach away! Along with that behavior they developed a dislike of getting out of bed.
Practically every patient that could get out of bed did! They proceeded to walk up and down the halls singing praises! It was so loud that many people came down from two floors above and thought they were missing a dress ceremony!! (more on that later...) When they came back into the ward, they all huddled by the door and were singing the same song over and over. The song goes as such:
On a random Tuesday one of the women decided to go for a walk down the hall. I stopped her at the door and told her she had to take some more women with her if she wanted to go for a walk. You see, the women have gotten lazy- demanding the nurses to get their water for them, while it is just an arms reach away! Along with that behavior they developed a dislike of getting out of bed.
Practically every patient that could get out of bed did! They proceeded to walk up and down the halls singing praises! It was so loud that many people came down from two floors above and thought they were missing a dress ceremony!! (more on that later...) When they came back into the ward, they all huddled by the door and were singing the same song over and over. The song goes as such:
"Doctor you've done a good work
You don't what good you've done
So I'm gonna tell you"
and also...
"You've given us meat
You've given us rice
You've given us water
We're strong now
So can we go?"
Who says you have to be a professional song-writer to sing good songs! Love them so much!
Wednesday, November 21, 2012
Never too old to color
It's amazing how fast time goes by. I feel like I say this a lot. Sorry it's been so long since I've posted anything, a picture would probably suffice, but some days the effort of getting the picture from my camera to computer then on my blog is just too much!
We are halfway through the second week of the fistula surgeries, and there isn't really a word to describe how it's going. Heart wrenching, difficult, and defeating are some words that immediately come to mind. These past two weeks have been a constant reminder that God is in control, and outcomes are his domain. Sometimes I get a little focused on outcomes, and lose sight of who we are helping. God gently reminded me this past week that it’s not about the outcomes. It’s about the individual. It’s about loving these ladies that have scarcely been shown what love is. It’s not about wet or dry, it’s not about the numbers, it’s about the individual, it's about love and acceptance.
One of the ladies told me that she’s been mistreated by the nurses in the fistula program at a local hospital. The nurse told her that her condition is a result of God being angry at her; that she sinned and brought this on herself.
Wow.
How can someone say that!
Realizing that many of the ladies on the ward had been treated at this same facility, I figured out that many had been told this same lie. So we sat them all down, told them how much God loves them, how it is not their fault, and we set out to explain what really happened to them.
It’s amazing how thirsty these women are for education. I pulled out a big poster of a woman about 9 months pregnant, and within a second had about 10 women surrounding me all eager to hear what I had to say. Through a translator (thank God for her!) we explained what happened during childbirth, and why they leaked urine after. They were in awe! They all thought it was their husband’s fault! hahaha we’ll work on that another day and time.
That’s all for now.
P.S. my favorite memory from this week...
I turned from my computer to find 3 grown women sitting very proper in bed, coloring in coloring books; they all wore the same serious, focused looks on their faces. hilarious.
you're never too old to color in a coloring book.
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Tears of hope
This past week I had the most amazing opportunity to go to Kissidougou with the director of USAID, Nancy Estes; Luciana, communications assistant (there isn't a title that would be descriptive enough of all that she does!); Dr. Balde, and Dr. Balde, two of my favorite Guineans; and Diawara and Alpha...the amazing drivers that got us safely through the many potholes, and craters in the Guinean roads!
The trip started off visiting various sites that USAID supports, and culminated with the most joyous celebration for the opening of the Fistula Wing of the Regional Kissidougou hospital. I can't even begin to describe all the emotions that flooded me as I stepped out of the car to see nurses, doctors, and local Guineans lined up to greet and welcome us. The sound of African tamborines, and women serenading us in their beautiful local tongue, so loud it was reverberating my heart. The sight of men, women, and children present to support the women, and chanting "éliminer les fistules" over and over. Not a dry eye in the house as a woman suffering from Obstetric Fistula recounted her story, with the hope of being treated in the new Fistula Wing. As I walked into the ward after the ceremonial ribbon cutting, I suddenly felt hands on my back, pushing me aside. As I turned around, the sight of hordes of fistula patients pushing through the crowds to get to the beds filled the room. Tears of hope in their eyes. It was a beautiful thing.
Along the way I took some snaps of cute kids, beautiful scenery, interesting transportation and the beautiful fistula ladies...enjoy!
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the sweetest kids ever! |
Celebrations galore for the opening of the Fistula Wing at Kissidougou Hospital |
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The interesting transportation of people and animals... |
the beautiful scenery!
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| sunrises |
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sunsets
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The team...
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| Dr. Balde #2 (the medical doctor one) |
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| Dr. Balde, Mr. Jean Keita (Mayor of Kissidougou), Nancy Estes (Director of USAID), and me! |
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| the lovely Luciana |
Sunday, September 30, 2012
Masked
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